{"id":6547,"date":"2024-08-24T16:43:54","date_gmt":"2024-08-24T14:43:54","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/hildijk.nl\/een-jaar-na-onze-keuze-onze-weg-samen-te-blijven-vervolgen\/"},"modified":"2024-08-29T22:48:06","modified_gmt":"2024-08-29T20:48:06","slug":"one-year-after-our-decision-to-continue-our-journey-together","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/hildijk.nl\/en\/one-year-after-our-decision-to-continue-our-journey-together\/","title":{"rendered":"One year after our decision to continue our journey together"},"content":{"rendered":"

[vc_row][vc_column width=”3\/4″][vc_column_text css=””]August 24, 2024[\/vc_column_text][vc_custom_heading text=”One year after our decision to continue our journey together” font_container=”tag:h1|text_align:center” use_theme_fonts=”yes” css=”.vc_custom_1724957898095{margin-top: 20px !important;}” subtitle=”Exactly 28 years after our first encounter with love at first sight”][vc_single_image image=”6549″ img_size=”full” alignment=”center” style=”vc_box_shadow_3d” css=””][vc_column_text css=””]Today 28 years ago, I saw you for the first time. In Hardenberg, you casually stepped into the house of a mutual friend. And I knew within 10 minutes: \u2018I’m going to marry you\u2019.<\/strong><\/p>\n

It is also thanks to the singularity of knowing immediately that you are my man, that after all these years carrying on this journey by myself, did and does not feel right.<\/p>\n

Everything I need, is already here.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Today, 26 years ago, we said YES to each other<\/strong>[\/vc_column_text][vc_column_text css=””]Our wedding day was not a \u2018standard day\u2019. We did things differently even then. Although I really did have a wedding dress, whereas I had always envisioned an evening dress. But having a plus size and no internet yet, I had to go for a slightly different coloured dress.<\/p>\n

Last year was our 25th wedding anniversary. And even though I had envisioned for many years how we would celebrate, it was far from that kind of party. I didn’t understand any of it.[\/vc_column_text][vc_row_inner][vc_column_inner width=”1\/2″][vc_column_text css=””]Completely down financially. Searching for a way to live in freedom, in a non-traditional way. With extremely few people around us who understand this. Away from the so-called security of a job\/company. Which keeps people in a kind of prison.<\/p>\n

Which also makes other types of income much more logical.[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner width=”1\/2″][vc_column_text css=””]And I realised (only) last week, how my own role in this is hugely important.
\n> What am I focusing on?
\n> And what am I getting?
\nDespite desires and vision and knowledge of how things work, my frequency is apparently unconsciously on the other side of what I want.<\/strong>
\nAnother great insight, which I have already started working on: changing Mindset.[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column_inner][\/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner][vc_column_inner][vc_column_text css=”.vc_custom_1724964318394{padding-top: 25px !important;}”]<\/p>\n

This life today brings many challenges. It requires going back to the basics again and again: deep trust.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Thanks to our lovely daughter, who travels with us and takes a huge interest in psychology, I am discovering, especially this past year, that what I had come to see as narcissistic traits are actually related to autistic traits.
\nAlthough I don’t like labels at all, sometimes it helps to gain insight.<\/p>\n

And I had to grow towards it. It did turn out to be an eye opener in the end. It explains a lot. And at the same time, it takes a lot out of me.<\/p>\n

The realisation that I will always have to ask for something, because you don’t see it on your own.
\nAsking…<\/p>\n

I am discovering that this is my biggest lesson.
\n\u2018I’ll do it myself\u2019
\nOr worse
\n\u2018I always have to do everything myself anyway\u2019<\/p>\n

I get to turn it around by indicating what I need.
\nAnd as simple as that sounds, I find this a tricky one.<\/p>\n

While that is exactly what you (and Yanaica) need. Clarity.
\nYou (unfortunately for me) are not a mind readers.
\nNot sensing what I need, but regularly sensing that I need something, because my energy changes when I need to ask but don’t.<\/p>\n

It is almost unimaginable that it took me so long to realise this.
\nA lot is becoming clear now[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column_inner][\/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner][vc_column_inner width=”1\/2″][vc_column_text css=””]Last year, thanks to a wonderful woman, I discovered that I don’t take my place. That this is why my body does it for me.<\/p>\n

Only now am I starting to realise that my difficulty in indicating what I need is related to this.<\/p>\n

Last year, it did become clear to me that quitting this relationship would not solve anything. I would, whatever was underlying it, take it to a new relationship.<\/p>\n

Then much rather stay with the man I love dearly. And only now beginning to understand more.<\/p>\n

The label explains a lot.[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner width=”1\/2″][vc_column_text css=””]Now I only have to discover how to deal with that.<\/p>\n

Probably, stating what I need is the biggest (and simplest) solution .<\/p>\n

And I promise you, I will practise that over the next year. And who knows, I might even just master it .It’s really just a switch. But I still find it scary ….<\/p>\n

Could that have to do with a previous past? That it wasn’t safe to say what I needed? Or that what I needed didn’t matter at all?<\/p>\n

Both feel right.<\/p>\n

I am facing another big change.[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column_inner][\/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner][vc_column_inner][vc_column_text css=”.vc_custom_1724964475743{padding-top: 25px !important;}”]How happy\u00a0 and lucky I am, to have you beside me.
\nMy beautiful husband.<\/p>\n

\ud83d\udc96 Who always tells me how much you love me and makes me feel loved.
\n\ud83d\udc96 How beautiful you think I am.
\n\ud83d\udc96 How beautiful my energy is.<\/p>\n

Many times I have said that one day I would really like to see myself through your eyes.
\nThen I would probably look at myself very differently afterwards.<\/p>\n

The challenge lies precisely in being able to\/learning to see that from my own point of view.<\/p>\n

I notice that some puzzle pieces are falling into place again.
\nIt is interesting what this intuitive writing, at a time when you think I am \u2018haunting\u2019, brings me in terms of insights.
\nIt helps me.<\/p>\n

And on our day, I promise you that in the coming year, I will be more mySelf. That I won’t have to hide. That I don’t need a mind-reading partner, if I simply state where my needs are. In all areas.<\/p>\n

Thank you for our journey together.
\nNot just the literal journey, which requires a lot from you, but especially the inner journey. For helping me grow.<\/p>\n

Thank you my love
\nI see you
\nI appreciate you
\nI love you with all my heart
\nOn to an amazing year<\/strong><\/span>[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column_inner][\/vc_row_inner][\/vc_column][vc_column width=”1\/4″][stm_sidebar sidebar=”527″][\/vc_column][\/vc_row][vc_row][vc_column][vc_empty_space][vc_zigzag color=”orange” el_width=”70″ css_animation=”fadeIn”][vc_empty_space][vc_custom_heading text=”Other blogs you might like” font_container=”tag:h1|text_align:center” use_theme_fonts=”yes” css=”.vc_custom_1724963793523{margin-top: 20px !important;}”][vc_basic_grid post_type=”post” max_items=”3″ css=”” grid_id=”vc_gid:1724964356879-75303c9a-c154-10″ taxonomies=”125, 131″ el_class=”consulting_posts posts_per_row_3″ exclude=”5499, 6410″][vc_empty_space][\/vc_column][\/vc_row]<\/p>\n<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

[vc_row][vc_column width=”3\/4″][vc_column_text css=””]August 24, 2024[\/vc_column_text][vc_custom_heading text=”One year after our decision to continue our journey together” font_container=”tag:h1|text_align:center” use_theme_fonts=”yes” css=”.vc_custom_1724957898095{margin-top: 20px !important;}” subtitle=”Exactly 28 years after our first encounter with love at first sight”][vc_single_image image=”6549″ img_size=”full” alignment=”center” style=”vc_box_shadow_3d” css=””][vc_column_text css=””]Today 28 years ago, I saw you for the first time. 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